PS: Sorry for blur image, lazy to edit brightness .
Okays , i know i haven been blogging for like 5 days ?
So here i am , to update my blog !
Cant really remember what happen the last few days so will just blog what i can remember .
Last Sat , meet up with Yiting Sister .
Went Bugis together & shopped .
Bought a necklace & made a bracelet with " x3 NICK "
Shopped till 6plus , 7plus , mrt-ed to Tampines Mall & walked around .
After th , accompany Yiting wait for bus & went to meet Stephanie Sweety .
Supposed to meet at City Hall but i alighted at Raffles Place instead .
Accompany her find her friend .
Was real bored laa .
So HE came down & find me .
Talked here & there , HE wanted to go Disco {the disco we went the other time to celebrate my birthday}
Waited for Sis & Bonez .
Cab-ed over there & wait .
Drank Martell .
Previously was very unhappy about some stuffs , but seeing HIM , makes me happy .
Took photos with Sis while smoking .
Went off at 1 AM plus .
Went HIS house .
When going to sleep , something happen which makes me damn mad with him .
A girl called HIM .
Okays , which girl wouldnt be angry when a girl calls her boyf at midnight ?
And so , HE had a hard time talking to me as i was really mad & didnt talk to him .
But still , i did forgive HIM .
{SUNDAY}
Went home in the morning .
Didnt saw Dad & younger sis at home so called Dad .
Went over MRT station & meet him .
Mrt-ed to Boon lay , bus-ed to Boys Home & visited Brother .
Im gonna visit him as often as i can cause he's my only Brother .
After everything , went home & slept for an hour before i went for work .
It was on my way to work , HE dropped that hurting news to me saying "shall we be friends?"
I was IN BUS at that time & guess what ?
That msg from HIM , made me teared even when im in bus .
Reached work place , immediately went find Lisa .
Told her "Lisa , i wanna resign now."
She went "HUH ?!?!?! WHY?!?!?! "
She doesnt allow .
Instead , i had a heart to heart talk with her for 40mins .
And the whole 40mins , i was crying .
In between , 2 colleague came & comfort me , telling me alot of things too .
So after the 40mins talk , Lisa told me to consider before making a decision .
I said Okay & went back to work .
Haziza told me not to resign & was all along trying to comfort me .
Mr Wee , the Security Officer asked me what happen & why i wanna resign .
But i just told him "Nothing"
But , i did told him what happen .
He told me not to resign & comforted me too .
Yun Hui asked me why i cried & who bully me .
And so , i continue working with a heavy heart .
Around 7PM plus , Rosie & May was in the Tea Room having dinner while i went & drink water .
They kept some bread for me & told me to eat it .
But i told them i dont have any appetite & didnt eat .
Continuing working without a smile when thats the usual thing they'll see on my face .
Went off at 10PM plus .
May reminded me to take the bread & i took it , thanking her .
Bus-ed home .
The moment i reached home , i went to my bed & break down the moment i lay at my bed .
I dunno why, i just cant take it .
I really felt very very down .
11plus like that , Yiting asked for HIS number saying that she got things to ask HIM , so i gaveher .
But i didnt know that she called & asked about why HE break up with me .
I called in & HE conference .
Talked for around 1 hour & i was crying during the whole conversation .
During the whole conversation , HE did the most talking .
Saying how good HIS ex was & how bad i was .
I really dunno what to say so i just kept quiet .
Halfway through the conversation , Yiting hang up , leaving me & HIM to talk .
But still i didnt talk much .
How you expect me to talk when you broke my heart , leaving me crying ?
I get what HE's trying to say , the whole conversation , what he wanna say is telling me to find someone better .
HE told me "We belong to different world , being friends is better"
After the conversation , we hang up & its over between us {thats what HE told me} .
And i realised that i cried for whole 6 hours !
Went back to bedroom , cried myself to sleep .
Monday , went back to work , with a fake smile .
Friends asked me if i felt better , i assured them that im better already when deep inside my heart , i felt so lousy .
Haziza saw me & asked how i felt .
I told her much better, not wanting her to worry .
Around 7PM plus , went to tea room rest for awhile .
Mr Wee came in & rest too . Had a heart to heart talk with him .
He told me, that life is full of ups & downs .
We shouldnt let those small things affect our life and alot alot more .
And i learned that he was in the police force for 34 years & had retired .
After that , he joined NTUC & had been in this line for 5 years !
And yup , had a nice time talking to him .
Sometimes i really wonder , if i should resign .
Cause i have great colleagues who cared for me everytime & even when im out of love .
Colleagues like Haziza , May , Rosie , Miao Jun , Lisa , Jasmine , Yoke Hong , Mike , Francis , Mr Wee , Yun Hui , Siu Hua , Alice , Meiling { the cashier lady } & those ladies working as cashier had been comforting me whenever they saw me cause they know im out of love .
And not forgetting friends like Yiting Sister , Joey Baobei , Euler Dumb , Cheryang ( one of my besti {: ) , Xiao Sky Dearest , Biqi Best Friend , Zhi Yu & also , my Sister , Yufeng .
They're the only one who knows im out of love & had been comforting me .
And today , HE msg me .
Asking "you busy" .
I replied with a "Nopes, why ? "
And HE just said nothing .
Although HE didnt say anything in the msg , i was happy to receive HIS msg .
Here are some photos & i rebonded my hair but it seems to curl back a little already ;
Blog another day .
Am talking to KC KORKOR at msn now !
We started off on 6 April 08 & went our own way on 17 August 08 .
It is so hard to accept it , that you wanted a break up when i dont want .
I know , im at fault this time .
I promised you i'll change but i didnt .
Its because i dont want to changed for the worse .
Last time with my ex , i tried to changed for him but i changed for the worse .
From as far as i can remember , i used to be a girl who hated smoking, who dont drink, who seldom scold vulgarity, who detest gangsters, who dont wore revealing clothings, who dont play online games, who had never ran away from home, & alot alot .
But ever since i stead with my ex , i ran away from home , i pick up smoking, vulgarity can be heard coming out from my mouth whenever i talked, i became very rude to my Dad, i started learning online games form him & spend alot of time on online games & friends even said i became more & more like ah lian .
Thats the reason why i didnt hold on my promise to you .
I was afraid i'll change for the worse instead of for the better .
But all along , i was trying my very best not to give you attitude, trying to be a good girlf .
But old habits are hard to quit .
Sometimes , you're too controlling .
Like when my fried calls me , you'll ask girl or boy , whats my friend name .
Same goes to it when i went out with my friends .
I know , you care .
But i just want you to put some trust in me just like how i trusted you .
I never asked who your friend or is your friend a girl or boy , because i trusted you .
Just like we only meet on Saturday nights , i dont ask where you went in the afternoon & evening time .
Its because i trust you .
But , everything's too late now .
You told me its over between the two of us .
This sentence that came out from your mouth , really makes me wanna end my life straight away .
Last Sunday {the day we broke up}, my phone seems to be spoilt .
I cant listen to any songs on my music player .
I went to the gallery & nothing from my memory card , images & photos , nothing were there .
Somehow i got worked up .
I kept on finding your photos but to no available .
When i cant find your pictures , i cried .
I've already lost you , i dont wanna lose your pictures .
After trying to fix the memory card thing , i got everything back safe in place , including your pictures, all my pictures & music .
The first thing i went & looked is your pictures .
When i looked at your pictures , i was happy but i cried cause i missed you badly .
Today , i received your msg .
I was happy , although your msg didnt say anything .
Awhile later , you msg-ed again .
This time , i know , you said being friends is better then couple .
But when i decide on something , nothing you say will make me change my mind .
I decided to wait , so i'll wait .
Like what i told you , i still love you , just like how i love you when we were together .
I never regretted being with you at all .
What i hope for now is that we can start afresh together .
If we can start afresh together , i'll treasure & cherish you & be a good girlf .
Baby , i'll wait for your return .
I love you & im sorry .
I miss you alot .
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